One Foot In Front Of The Other: Remember to Take A Deep Breath During The Holidays.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year! Merry Christmas! Happy Holidays! But what if they aren’t happy? What if they are just holidays?

I never thought I would still be alive - not to mention being here - in this town - in this house, having to manage my life, let alone trying to have happy holidays.

For decades, I have struggled and battled with depression and suicidal ideations. I have landed in the hospital multiple times. A few years ago, my holidays were spent admitted to the psychiatric hospital. The thoughts just roll: What am I doing here? What am I supposed to do? Who am I supposed to be? How can I plan for a future when I can’t even envision next week?

Deep Breaths.

Inhale…Exhale…Inhale…Exhale…

Try to focus on today...Inhale…Exhale…if today is too big and feels too vast; let’s try to focus on this hour...Inhale…Exhale…or this minute...Inhale…Exhale…

Try to remember these things when the panic attack starts to creep in:

5 things you see

4 things you can touch

3 things you can hear

2 things you can smell

1 thing you can taste

Another deep breath in and try to start again.

Life does not need to be planned out. Let’s just get through this hour. This day.

I am reminded of a song from a holiday classic: “Santa Claus is Coming to Town” – Put One Foot in Front of The Other, sung by Keenan Wynn and Mickey Rooney.

“If you want to change your direction

If your time of life is at hand